L&L like to help

My kids have 2 very different ideas of helpful.  Laney is truly helpful.  She tidies up toys and messes left behind by her brother, organizes books on the shelves, and even dresses herself for me.  Last night she even got her room and Liam's ready for bed while I dressed him in his jammies, setting out books for me to read to Liam and layed out his sleep sack on the reading chair (so cute!).

Liam has a different idea of helpful.  He tries, it's just that when he is helpful I usually have an extra hour or 2 of undoing his helpfulness.  In the span of the last 24 hours, he has done the following "helpful" things:
1.  Carried a bowl of {thankfully dry} cereal to the table and dropped it on the floor, covering our kitchen in Chocolate Rice Krispies.
2.  Vacuumed up the Rice Krispies, and then went on to vacuum up the magnetic alphabet letters and Mr. Potato Head arms and ears.
3.  Cleaned off the dinner table by flinging the rice onto the newly vacuumed floor.
4.  Helped me do the laundry by taking out the lint screen in the dryer to clean it, and then stuffed Mickey Mouse magnets into the lint trap of the dryer.
5.  Folded laundry that I had just folded by throwing it into a pile onto the floor as I fished the magnet out of the dryer.

So, in the last 24 hours I have vacuumed twice, taken apart the vacuum bag to find the magnets and appendages, scrubbed the rice off the chairs and table, refolded the laundry, and MacGyvered a magnet retrieval tool out of a telescoping Swiffer duster with duct tape wrapped around the end.  I played a frustrating game of Operation with our dryer, beating it after a few rounds of almost pulling the magnet out of the lint trap and then dropping it just as it hit the opening.  Side note:  our 15 year old babysitter didn't know what I was talking about when I told her I MacGyvered something and I had to explain it to her.  Ugh I feel old.  

At any rate, my little Liam is doing his best, but helpful he is not.  At least he still thinks cleaning is fun.

A PSA for anyone in the vicinity of Liam

Dear men of North America:

If you have a super short haircut (think clippers set on 1), are dressed in a trendy fashion, or drive a black SUV of any kind, Liam will automatically run up to you and hug you assuming you are Daddy.  At this point he will look up as you look down, and he will realize that you are not Daddy, and begin screaming.  This will cause everyone in your immediate area to believe you are attempting to kidnap my son, causing old ladies and mothers to tighten their grips on their purses and children, eyeballing you as you flame red with embarrassment over the awkward situation.

You have been warned!

There's a new sheriff in town

And her name is Sheriff Mommy.  
Seriously though, I have been cracking down on Liam (aka T.O., named by my family for the massive amount of time outs this kid wracks up each day) lately and I think I might be winning.  Might being the operative word.  Liam is very definitive in what he does and doesn't want to do and we have been embroiled in a power struggle for 3 weeks now over who will be the boss of the house.  As of today, I am happy to announce that I am relatively sure the boss is me.  Sure I have to count to five and threaten a time out, reminding him to make a "good choice," every time I need him to behave, but I am finding myself doing that less and less these days.   Added bonus, he is so good at T.O. now that I just have to tell him to go take a T.O. and he grumpily trots to the bottom of the stairs and sits himself down.  He also comes and tattles on himself after doing something to make Laney cry, slinking in the room covering his eyes with one hand muttering naughty.  Maybe Liam is capable of impulse control after all.  The jury is still out...

Liam vs the babysitter

I dropped the kids off at my mom's house this morning so I could go work out at the gym.  Upon my return, Sonia reported that both of the kids were pretty good, although she did mention an incident with Liam.  It got too quiet in the house, and she found Liam in the living room STANDING ON TOP OF THE GRAND PIANO!  When he spotted her, he shook his finger at her and said "NO NO NO NO!"

Even he knew he was being naughty.  Oh Liam...

What do these things have in common?

rock

fork

wooden puzzle piece

sippy cup

8 loveys

straightening iron

q-tip

Kindle

plastic broccoli

flashlight

glasses

Carmex

Answer?  These are all things I found in bed with me after letting Liam get out of his crib at 6:15 this morning.  We share one big room in Tahoe, so I knew that I could keep an eye on him {sort of} while I tried to catch a few more zzz's.  Leaving a one year old to his own devices is an interesting social experiment, and I am still scratching my head over where the fork came from...

Laneyism

We were driving behind an older car today that was belching out black smoky exhaust.  Pretty soon our car was filled with the delicately scented aroma of burning rubber.  Laney asked me why it smelled so bad and I told her that the car in front of us was really stinky.  She then announced that the driver in front of us really needed to give their car a bath so it would smell better!  How cute is that??

Having 2 kids is like...

Having two children under age four in the house is like having two very small ninjas follow you everywhere you go, booby trapping anything they think you might touch.  I realized as I made breakfast this morning that I operate under the assumption that everything is about to leak, spill, or explode on me {and usually does!}  Note to whoever unscrewed the syrup lid enough to make the it fall off while I was squeezing the bottle onto Liam's waffle:  I'm onto you.  I've narrowed it down to 2 candidates and I know where you live.

Now, it's time for some wipees and a mop.